Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
