What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Randomize
