Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Randomize
