oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
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