Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize