Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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