so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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