I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
