sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
what day is it and did you see me today?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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