And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
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