I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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