i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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