I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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