we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize