just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
