bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
