To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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