I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Randomize
