ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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