Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
