Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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