i permit you to call me
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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