Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
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