I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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