hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
