Your tits are I can't wait for
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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