yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
