doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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