Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
