omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Duck Duck Cougar?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
