Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 609 share tweet
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
