this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
