Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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