You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
