I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
