If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Randomize
