i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
