She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
it's great music for shaving your balls
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
