I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
