the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Randomize
