She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
