yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
