More tranny stories later!
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
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