It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
