idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
