Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
it glows. i had to have it.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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