The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
