my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
