Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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