Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
