My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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