I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Its about making memories worth repressing
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
You were trust falling into bushes
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
